In a departure from my regular rambling drivel, I decided this Monday’s blog post needed to be a bit more… er… commercial. You see, the Fourth of July is approaching and I’ve done absolutely nothing to prepare you. Let’s just mark that down to my own “Go Slow” stylings, if we may.
Of course, better late than never.
As most Gringos are undoubtedly better planners than yours truly, I’m sure you’ve completed the bulk of your preparations for the big day. But maybe there is still something missing. That’s why I’m tossing out this last minute tee deal at the low price of $14.99. Get our Patriotic Skull Tee or The Gringo Flag now at this special price. And if you order by Wednesday, we’ll even get it to you before the big day. I hope.
Other than the proper attire, your 4th celebration should include some delicious, dubious-for-your-health foods…
My personal favorites are Bratwurst, homemade Mac & Cheese, and apple pie for desert. I know, that almost sound like a car commercial.
You might also choose to partake in a few adult beverages.
Yes, variety is the spice of life. But remember, keep it under control – nobody likes dragging a drunk back inside after the fireworks show. In fact, ignore this warning and you might wake up in the back yard covered in mosquito bites.
And speaking of fireworks, what could be more American that hundreds of dollars of combustible Chinese noise-makers that you can burn up in five minutes flat?
I’m sure the founding fathers would be proud.
See, they're smiling. Well, sort of smiling, anyway.
As for myself, I’ll just be hanging out by the water, watching you all go crazy.